Wonderful post Lynn40, I was going to post mostly exactly that, only I couldn't have worded it so nicely.

Looking just at your and your wife's lunch is not enough to say : "we eat the exact same", I saw this program on telly a few months back where 2 girls said we eat exactly the same and one kept putting on weight, so they followed them around and in fact they were not eating the same. One would go for a huge latte instead of an espresso and had like 200 cals more right there, then they both had the same foo, but one had a diet coke and the other one an apple juice, while healthier the apple juice had another 150 cals, and like that all the time.
My man was fat as a child, he lost all his weight when he was 15 or 16 (went from 200 to 155 and has maintained since... so for 8 years), he watches what he eats a bit (not too much sweeties, he doesn't drink fizzy drinks, he never eats fast food), but still eats tons of food... probably about twice the amount I eat. But he burns it as well, he swims with a team 4 to 5 times a week (sometimes 6 days a week), and not just a bit of swimming, he swims 2 or 3 miles each time... but we are all different! So if your wife is not gainig weight eating over 1000 cals for lunch, she is probably not having much breakfast or dinner, or working out, or just moving around a ton...

There are lots of activities you can do together, for example skating (on iceskates or rollerblades)! It is so much fun! Go to a class together to feel safe on your blades or skates and then you can make it a weekly thing (just free lance, without the teacher). One evening a week instead of movie and popcorn, go out and blade for a couple of hours. That will burn around 800 to 1000 cals!
Or take a ballroom dance class! So much fun! And active!

The man and I have done rock climbing, twice weekly we would go to a rock climbing centre and climb, was great fun (but you may not feel comfortable with this, we are quite adventurous people...), we now swim together some days, or just go for very long walks (4 or 5 hours on weekends), we iceskate or run/blade (he runs I blade) when we find a bit of time... it is great!
You don't need to go to the gym for exercise (or at least not exclusively). If you live anywhere but London you will be able to use the summer days for long walks or other outdoorsy activities!
Have fun! Camy

__________________