There is nothing to be embarrassed about with your situation! I think that being able to post about this, being able to talk about it and ask for advice is admirable, and a big step in solidifying your recovery. It is not a hopeless situation, you will find something that works for you. I am on the road to recovery as well, and it is not an easy road to take. I am recovering from ednos; I went from being a binge eater to anorexic to bulimic then back to
binge eating. Went from
fat to skinny to normal to obese...
I am not sure how long you have been recovered, but it is very common to gain weight while taking in a "normal" amount of
calories. It will get better with time as your
body adjusts to having more fuel. You have not failed, failure would be continuing with an eating disorder. Recovery=success!
It seems like you are still pretty hard on yourself, you need to give yourself a break! I know it is not as easy as said, but it really does help.
It is not a bad idea to go to the dr and explain your situation (if they don't already know). Anorexia is not easy on the
body, and it really is possible that you have a vitamin deficiency or something of that nature going on. Cut back on the strenuous workouts until you feel less fatigued, make sure your eating nutritious foods, and get enough sleep! I know this is basic advice, but the
body requires good care for you to feel good, physically and mentally. I have been taking care of myself physically for 8 months and for the first time I feel happy, positive, and energetic.
Stick with it, you will get to where you want to be (as long as it is health and realistic), you just have to keep fighting!
