Hi guys!

I'm new here so I guess I'll give a quick intro! I'm a 23 year old guy who's been overweight for most of my life. Not massively over, just enough to be singled out as the chubby guy of the group - I'm 5'8" and at my biggest I was over 14 stone (about 200lbs). With diet and exercise I lost 2 stone between January and April this year (down to about 170lbs).

Recently I've put a little back on (probably 7lbs or so) and I'm worried I'm backsliding. The problem is I'm something of a party guy - I'm always the first to go out and the last to leave, and I love a drink. This usually leads to the typical greasy kebab on the way home (although I now eat fried chicken usually - like that's much better!)

I've been very tight on money recently too, so I quit the gym I was going to (I hadn't been in a good month anyway). I was cycling around 4 miles to work everyday (and back), but that seems to have slipped too. Lately I seem to be drinking more and doing less, even though I've maintained a relatively healthy diet.

The weight isn't piling back on, but by the same token I'd ideally like to drop another 20/30lbs or so (my target weight is around 11 stone/154lbs). This will involve a lot of hard work, and I'm finding it very hard to come to terms with the prospect of no more partying!

Has anyone else had a similar experience, and if so can you share any advice on how to deal with this situation? I always seem to get lured into having one drink and then one suddely turns into 5....

Luke x

P.S. Look forward to getting to know you guys, I'll be jumping on board the challenges thread sometime very soon!

Hi Luke and welcome!

I don't think you should give up fun at all! However, I would question how much fun you are having when you are deriving SO much pleasure from consuming alcohol and fast food . . . and your results are that you are not so happy with the physical consequences of this lifestyle. Admission: I go out with friends occasionally, drink very little or not at all, but will dance (at a club) pretty much the entire time--sometimes this keeps me out pretty late (not helpful if you do this regularly, as sleep aids in maintaining a healthy weight). Instead of denying yourself the pleasure of partying, see where you can start adding more pleasurable activities during the day that do not involve food or drinking. Continue playing with your current group of friends, but over the next couple of weeks, commit to adding more activities YOU GENUINELY ENJOY during the day. When you have other outlets of fun, you don't put all your fun apples in one basket--you diversify your pleasure!

Look into hanging out with friends (new or old) who enjoy being active during the day and maybe engage in a sport or recreation you'd been curious about trying (and be very willing to suck at it, be playful and have fun). For example, I just started surfing, my friend has an extra surf board, is showing me the ropes and it's not costing me a dime, and it's WAY more fun than hittin' the gym (for me). Be open to ideas that come your way and get creative, there's a whole world out there filled with fun and super cool things to do--partying is fun, but you're limiting yourself if this is the only fun activity you do. You're young, have a sense of adventure, there's so much out there that will give you a rush far greater than alcohol can give you. Aren't you excited, now?!!

I'll be curious to know what sorts of fun situations you're gonna get yourself into, so update us please :-)

I agree 100% with what Emiko said above.

You have to train yourself to separate eating/drinking with fun. I know how hard it is. In our family celebration = food. Party = food. Family = food. Any time we get together it's all about cooking for each other, sitting down over the dinner table, having drinks, having a cookout ... etc. Learning to separate the eating part from the having fun part was hard for me at first.

This makes a lot of sense - I tend to stay up really late as well because my shifts are work are somewhat odd (4 days of 12 hours, 10am to 10pm), so this really messes with my sleeping patterns.

You know what? My Xbox broke two days ago, and I think that might be a sign! I've got a big list of stuff I've idly put together and been too lazy to try out, and I think it's about time I tried some of it

First 2 things on the list:

1) Go play at more open mic nights (meet new people)

2) Get back into martial arts (there's a muay thai place about 2 miles from my house)

I've made a vow to stop drinking for at least two weeks to help kick-start my weight loss. I'll let you know how I get on, don't be surprised if I come back and ask you to shout at me for wanting to sneak out for a beer though...

Thank you for the advice gals