Hi Sam, I started typing something in your diary at lunch-time but decided I sounded too crabby. We sure are a funny bunch. I feel sorry for men trying to work us out when we have enough trouble working ourselves out.
My YS just emailed me a photo of his arm & at first I thought it was a joke but, on checking it carefully, realised unfortunately that it's not! Ugh!! It's also huge! I won't be having a copy of that hanging on my wall!! He has incorporated the long-life symbol from Vietnam with a bloody great fish & other unknowns. Ugh, ugh, ugh!! That's all the sooking you are going to hear about this I promise. That's my vent for the day! Bye, Cate.

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Lost 36kgs 2007(Cohen's),now maintaining.
"Nothing tastes as good as slim feels".Mmm?No!Not even French Champagne!!

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Its on my lower back about the size of a 50c coin, its the chinese symbol for faith

When i first went to have it done i saw in the book (which they were going to get the stencil from) the had the symbol for teach under faith.. lucky i can read/write chinese!!

makes me wonder how many people walk around with the wrong one tattoo'd on them

Hi Sam, I didn't take it the wrong way don't worry. I'm going to try not to think about it much. His tastes usually match mine so I was very surprised that I really disliked it. I'll get over it. I don't know if my LH will though!
Hi Princess, I thought that my son would have something similar in Chinese lettering maybe combined with the long-life symbol. I actually quite like similar tattoos. My disability client has a few & while they are a bit too large for my liking I like the look of them & what they symbolise. I guess it was(is) the size of it, how prominant it is & it's horrible. There is a cartoon character along the edge of it which I missed on first sight. It was hard to get my eyes away from the humungous fish.
I don't mind if everyone thinks I'm making a fuss over nothing but yuck! I'm not looking forward to him asking me what I think but I am very grateful that I got to see a photo first so I can tone down the reaction. I actually shuddered last night out at 8-ball thinking of it.
I've had a good day today. I went into my local town & did some supermarket shopping. Called in at my MIL's first & did some for her as well (including her cigarettes!); picked up the new Wackie Walker itinerary & the walk scheduled for when Kannadew is here is actually the Cradle Mountain area & is classified as a medium walk, not hard, so we should be able to do that together. I'm getting quite excited about it. Now I'll try & talk my LH into coming too! We haven't been up there for years & years-probably 10-15!
Have had a brief visit from my OS & a friend of his. They had been wood-cutting & called in here for a free beer! We don't drink it but always have it in the fridge for visitors.
I have ordered & paid for the fencing materials to fence off both sides of our drive so work should start on that soon which will be great. We have had 10 sheep visit us lately & I found out today who they belong to. I told him we would be very happy if they had an extended stay with us as our grass is so long & he said to let him know when they have outstayed their welcome. I love living in the country & we have a very good relationship with all of our neighbours. None of us live in one another's pockets also which is great.
I'm back at work tomorrow but then have Saturday off. Unfortunately my LH organised a golf game before he knew I had the day off so am not sure what I will do. There is a local market once a month & I am usually working so I might go to that. It's a very social occasion. I was going to take my client but I might go on my own.
I rang a friend today & have made tentative arrangements to visit her with the 2 older grandkids in a couple of weeks. She is the carer/partner of our old friend who died in the house fire. She lives right on the beach in a caravan park so I thought it might be nice to take the GK's & I might just go swimming with them. This might not sound anything out of the ordinary to anyone else but no-one has seen me in bathers for about 20 years. My veins won't be too good-looking(they do look better than before though) & my legs are pretty flabby(where once lived lots of fat) but I'm going to do it! She sounded pleased that I am going to visit so that's nice. She loves kids.
I had better stop rambling on & go have a look about, cheers, Cate.

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Lost 36kgs 2007(Cohen's),now maintaining.
"Nothing tastes as good as slim feels".Mmm?No!Not even French Champagne!!

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Hi Sam, It's not this week-end. I wish it was. I have come home really p...'d off with work. OK. I'll admit it- I am not enjoying this job. Like the client, not enjoying the job. There is no real communication between my employer & staff. No-one is up-front about anything. I am getting really sick to death of it all. I think I'm stuck between a rock & a hard place. My client says one thing but I hear the opposite from others. I think every-one else is not giving her credit for having any intelligence. It is very frustrating. I am being told not to do this, not to do that, but not being told what to actually do. Don't do any housework.... Most of the things are just so bloody obvious Iam wondering who is actually doing them anyway. Don't dry her back-doh! I taught her to dry her own back 2nd day. I feel there is some hidden agenda at play. I know one of the other workers was playing games early on, hoping I wouldn't work out. Also after being told not to do Mum's housework I think she may be giving my boss the wrong impression. My client & I get on very well & have a lot of laughs. She is no fool. I think mum may have been very happy with me doing the housework & isn't now that I have stepped back a little with it.
I'm not going to go back & read all this because I really need to get it out. I am so angry & upset. My boss rang to say we are having a team meeting next Friday. I am meant to be working so probably will have that shift cut short & more than likely won't get paid for that either. The 5&3/4 hr Induction day they only paid me 2 hours & this week I had 2 shifts cancelled at the last minute (1x8hr shift@1.5 + 1x8hr shift) because Mum decided that she wanted some time alone with her. I think perhaps I might be getting on better than she likes. I find this a bit disconcerting & am very confused.
I do know that I am going to start looking for another job. I would prefer to work in a place where your job is more defined & instructions are clearer. Too much of this job is left to your discretion but your decisions or judgements are undermined & there is too little communication. I would hate to run a business this way.
OK-got that off the chest. I'm attacking the key-board here. This job is not good for me. I am so close to tears.
Another thing in the letter to all the support workers, via the mother was to not ask our client what she would like to do, don't take her for walks(in the wheelchair) as it's too tiring, try to talk her out of shopping, I could go on for ages.... I would like (love) to know what they would like us to do!!
Grumpy, Cate

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Lost 36kgs 2007(Cohen's),now maintaining.
"Nothing tastes as good as slim feels".Mmm?No!Not even French Champagne!!

Ohhh Cate,

I hate those lack of direction days and not knowing where you are headed next. I hope the weekend gives you a refreshing break and gets you ready to face the next week.

Connie

Thanks Connie, It had been a pretty good day up until the letter arriving. We(my client & I) both enjoy Fridays. My husband says I should not take it personally but I find this really hard. I think if someone is doing the wrong thing they should be told directly. If it is me then so be it. I will take constructive criticism on board. I don't like this general criticism as it does lump us all in the same boat & I don't think it's fair. There was some really personal,offensive stuff in there that I wouldn't think of doing. Unfortunately I have to work Sunday & Monday so won't get much of a break this week-end.
I ended up lying in bed stewing about it, after watching a late SBS movie & didn't get to sleep until after 1am.
Funny thing is I feel much better this morning, but determined to really speak my mind at the team meeting on Friday. I am also going to look for a new job.
I'll be back later, Cate.

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Lost 36kgs 2007(Cohen's),now maintaining.
"Nothing tastes as good as slim feels".Mmm?No!Not even French Champagne!!

Just thought I should mention that in today's paper there is an ad for "dedicated staff to fill casual positions for Registered Nurses, extended care assistants & service staff. We are expanding our capacity at both G......(high care) & K......(low care). The successful applicants would be available to work at both sites." These 2 places have recently amalgamated & are in my local town. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Surely position responsibilities would be clearer than at present. I'll try to get away for a 15 minute break during the day on Monday to ring for more info. One of my neighbours works at the low care facility. I might ring her up in a minute & ask a few questions. Cheers, cate

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Lost 36kgs 2007(Cohen's),now maintaining.
"Nothing tastes as good as slim feels".Mmm?No!Not even French Champagne!!

That sounds like the plan Cate. It's never good to stay where you aren't happy because you will undo all your positive work.

Keep smiling

Connie

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Waiting to start Cohens.

Thanks Connie, You're right. I feel better just contemplating this change. I think it's called fine tuning. I haven't got my job change down pat just yet!
Where is everyone tonight? Out galivanting? Hope you're not all out being naughty deviators!! See you, Cate

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Lost 36kgs 2007(Cohen's),now maintaining.
"Nothing tastes as good as slim feels".Mmm?No!Not even French Champagne!!

Hi Cate,

Sorry to hear that the job s*cks at the moment, I think you should look around and see what else is out there, the one you saw advertised in the paper sounds pretty good! You would not have any problem getting any job Cate, I wish you the best, I know how it feels to be in a job that is not providing much satisfaction and I also think no job is worth making you feel the way you are feeling at the moment...ditch it and move on!
Gee I am straight to the point aren't I? doh !

Re:my job? well waiting to hit my 10 year long service (feb 9th), take 3 weeks annual leave as of 7th feb, have a holiday up in Qld, then come back and start looking to see what's out there, I have my moments some days I like it , some days I hate it..to top things off we have moved from the city and now are working in Collingwood, I hate it there, I miss the city, I miss the Vic markets (worked around the corner) I worked in the city for 20 years and I feel like i am working in a different city now....grrrr

Thanks for your lovely words in my diary Cate and thanks for believing in me, I think maybe I should start doing that too...

Have a good day at work today and Monday and don't let things get you down.

TTFN
Annie Lusion

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Hey Cate
Sounds like things are pretty Sucky at the moment! I totally agree with you that if someone is going to bring criticism they should bring it directly to your face… however, I think I also agree with your hubby! =) Don’t take it personally. I think if you WERE doing something wrong specifically they would have said something by now and therefore these things are obviously directed at other team members to whom they may have already had one on one conversations with about these issues. If you know that you have not done anything and your relationship with your client is great then relax and don’t take these issues on board. Obviously looking for a new job, which provides clearer structure and hierarchy is something you still want to investigate, but while you are still there, don’t let it eat you up.

It sounds like a good idea to have your say at the team briefing this week! I think you could be direct with them and ask them to be specific with individual staff if they have issues, so that the rest of the staff don’t feel lumped into the same box as others who are not performing well.

Anyway… just my 2cs worth!!

Cradle Mountain!!! Sounds Lovely!! I am really looking forward to it!!! Maybe I should start increasing my walking etc so that I can handle a bush walk! EEEEk…. I cant wait! Only 84 days!!

Anyway gotta go!
Blessya
Kannadew

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Started 21/5/07 Goal 1: 99.9kg
Goal 2:79.9kg Goal 3:72kg G4:62kg

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Thank you Annie, Kannadew & Sam, I value your input & really appreciate you taking the time out for me. I have been trying to pretend that I am doing fine with the job, mainly because I didn't want to feel a failure & I was so enthusiastic at the start. I guess I'm embarrassed as well as disappointed. Mainly I get confused as to what I am meant to be doing. I have resented the general criticism & don't feel it is personally warranted. I do appreciate having clearer direction re not having my client & her mother becoming dependent on us. I will speak up on Friday. It worries me that I don't feel that what I say will be confidential though which is a worry. One of the other support workers I fear is trying to undermine the others, including me. Today my client said "......." she's always talking s...t, she never shuts up" & I laughed & said "I hope you don't say that about me when I'm not here" & she let me know that she didn't think that way about me. I never criticise the others. We do get on very well. I would hate to let her down & leave. It's hard really.
Today when I got to work the smell of the kitty litter made me gag & her brother's cigarette smoking & spraying Lynx de-odorant had me hanging my head out the front door gasping & needing to use a puffer within an hour. I am also eating more than I should & drinking more! I know that it is not doing me much good. I can leave if I wish luckily. We would manage.
It is a shame that disability support has such a big turnover of staff. It is well known. I don't know if every employer is as disorganised as mine. I hope not. I am going to speak up though at the meeting but will mention that what we say at the team meeting should be confidential. I am not at all confident that it will be. I really distrust one of the other workers. She tries to undermine us all in the hope of getting more hours, hoping that we won't work out.
I'll come back later I think. I need some yoghurt!
Speaking of yoghurt. My local re-cycling depot is now re-cycling no 5 so Vaalia is ok. Happy about that. I'm sorry I didn't chat to each of you separately. It now seems rude!
K-the Cradle Mountain Walk is only medium, not hard & there are 2 groups within the Wackies & they are both going. There will be simple walks & medium so lots of choice. Don't sweat over it-literally. We can have a lazy bones walk if we want. A gas-bagging, leisurely walk!! Cheers all & thanks again, xo Cate

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Lost 36kgs 2007(Cohen's),now maintaining.
"Nothing tastes as good as slim feels".Mmm?No!Not even French Champagne!!