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  So Embarrassed ... PLEASE HELP Post #1 (permalink)  
Old July 24th, 2007, 06:40 PM
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So Embarrassed ... PLEASE HELP

I am so embarrassed and ashamed with myself. I started the Cohen's diet last year and stuck strictly to it, never once deviated and I watched the weight fall off. I lost 16 kgs and got down to a fantastic 57kgs. I hovered around 57 -60kgs for 6 months, then after my 40th birthday I lost the plot.

I have gained all the weight I lost!! I'm too scared to actually weigh myself, but I am back into the only size 14 jeans I kept. I gave away all my 'fat' clothes and now have nothing to wear.

I think my husband feels I am a failure, he's not said as much, but he has made some subtle comments to the fact that I had put the weight back on. Now I am putting up walls around myself when it comes to him - which I did when I first put all the weight on and pick fights with him just so he won't touch me. I feel so embarrassed.

When my friends and even my sister see me now they blame the Cohen’s for my weight gain. I see the smug looks they give me. Especially when I get comments like - 'you look so much better when you’re carrying a bit more weight' - I DON'T. When I was losing the weight originally, they would constantly say things like 'you’re losing too fast' 'you’re just going to put it all back on again'. The thing is I don't believe it was the diet, just my ridiculous over eating. I literally lost the plot. I decided that I didn't need to follow the advice given at the end of the program.

I'm really depressed again, feeling all the old symptoms of bad eating and being so down am back to drinking 3 - 5 glasses of red wine a night. I'm that depressed over it I just can't seem to get on top of things. I know it sounds pathetic, but I can't believe that I was where I wanted to be and things just got out of control again. I can't stop crying when I think about it. Even my little girl said mummy your getting really fat again - just killed me.

The worst thing is I am meeting up with a dear family member today that I last saw when I had lost all the weight and he was just so proud of me. Now ....

I want to go back on the plan, but the Cohen's person and some others have said that I would need to buy a whole new plan for it to work again. Has anyone ever put all the weight back on they lost and gone back on to the same plan and successfully lost again. I've started a couple of times to go back on my old plan, but my head takes over with 'it won't work again for you' so I give up again.

Sorry if I sound really pathetic, but I would really like to talk to anyone that has done it again on the same plan.

I am going to give it a last ditch effort starting tomorrow (only cause it's shopping day). I've also starting back at the gym on Monday, so hopefully this will be a start to my second time around.

Any encouraging advice would be SO VERY MUCH APPRECIATED.

thanks

FB40
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  So Embarrassed ... PLEASE HELP Post #2 (permalink)  
Old July 24th, 2007, 07:59 PM
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I do understand what you are going through; I have been through the same situation more than once. But you have done it once and you can do it again. You need to believe in yourself and get the focus and the determination that you had before to get down to the fantastic weight of 57 kgs. Imagine how good you felt about yourself. There is no use feeling sorry for yourself. Only you can do something for yourself. Once you start losing the weight again you will be better and then anything anyone says shall not matter.

The longer you feel sorry about yourself and continue doing what you are doing now the longer it will take to retrace your steps back.

Here is something nice which is inspiring and motivational The Nature of Success Movie

Remember you have done it before and you can do it again..
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  So Embarrassed ... PLEASE HELP Post #3 (permalink)  
Old July 24th, 2007, 09:09 PM
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FB$)

Man do I hear ya'...I started my cohens plan last August and lost 26kg before falling off the wagon at christmas time, and here I am with 24kg back on... it is embarassing, and you feel like everyone around you is constantly sureveilling you, because they have seen the yo yo weight loss and gain, I reckon the hardest thing about struggling with weight loss is that it is so public...I mean everyone struggles with something in their lives, but other people can hide their struggles, but you cant hide your weight totally from the wolrd (i wish).
I suppose the important thing to remember is that you KNOW without a doubt that the cohens plan works...youve been there and done it, and you have learnt that you will need to follow the guidelines once you have succesfully completed the plan again.

I have only just recommitted after stuffing around for so long...we can do this together!!!!!!

Peace
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  So Embarrassed ... PLEASE HELP Post #4 (permalink)  
Old July 24th, 2007, 11:58 PM
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FB40- I am only on day 3 of re-feed so can't help with advice about whether to sign up for a new plan or just use your old one. I just wanted to let you know that your plea really touched me. If you were able to follow the plan, get to your goal weight & keep it off for 6 months, then you will be able to do it again. You now have the extra knowledge that will enable you to keep it off forever. Don't be so hard on yourself. I don't know any perfect people! xo & a big Cate.
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  So Embarrassed ... PLEASE HELP Post #5 (permalink)  
Old August 2nd, 2007, 07:02 PM
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FB40

hows it going? plodding along?
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  So Embarrassed ... PLEASE HELP Post #6 (permalink)  
Old August 3rd, 2007, 06:34 PM
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Try again - keep on posting..

FB40... how are you coming along?

I am so glad to have read your thread, I am in a similar situation, and I have been thinking is it right to go back on to the diet... I am going to try again on the same plan.

Yes, I have had pathetic attempts at it before, but now I am really feeling like I will get my act together and go for it.

I'm about to head to Coles and the green grocers to get a whole bunch of stuff.. and for a couple of years I have seen these forums and they are really quite inspiring. Nestki for example!

So i've joined and am starting again. Fingers crossed. I am kind of doing this in secrecy, which I know isn't a good start, but my bf knows and I have asked for his help.

I'm going to take Netski's advice from her thread in Before and Afters.. "Current number 1 tip - find 2 dinners which you really like and 2 lunches and then eat them every day for as long as you can handle - the more to disassociate yourself with food and pleasure the better. After all medicine never tastes great!"

FB40 - let us know how you are going?
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  So Embarrassed ... PLEASE HELP Post #7 (permalink)  
Old August 6th, 2007, 09:50 PM
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As hard as it is, pick yourself up, dust off those negative thougths and get back into it!! Getting active will help you physically and mentally-once you start moving you will feel better.
I don't know about using the same plan but it will be better than where you are now. Set a goal, then another until you get where you want. The hardest thing about staying at goal is facing all your demons and slaying them once and for all. We all have to deal with these and sometimes it takes a couple of go's.
You can do it - You have before so now do it again!! You are not a failure!!
Chin up, take care and Stay Vibrant! Dwali
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  So Embarrassed ... PLEASE HELP Post #8 (permalink)  
Old August 6th, 2007, 10:38 PM
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i fell off the wagon and i have kept about 6kgs off. am back on it now after being so ashamed when my sister came to surprise me for my birthday and the first things she did was tell me how fat i am. she could not hide her surprise and i have just ignored my poor discipline for too long.

good luck everyone, we will get there.
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  So Embarrassed ... PLEASE HELP Post #9 (permalink)  
Old August 7th, 2007, 10:24 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mrs Clooney View Post
i fell off the wagon and i have kept about 6kgs off. am back on it now after being so ashamed when my sister came to surprise me for my birthday and the first things she did was tell me how fat i am. she could not hide her surprise and i have just ignored my poor discipline for too long.

good luck everyone, we will get there.
Hi MC, horrible feeling isn't it.. But you've obviously made the decision for yourself - just try hard to stick to it and think of all the things you will gain. I just keep thinking about how much healthier I will feel rather than how I look at this point in time, and that's a real boost for me.

It is a good feeling we are all in the same boat with this - keep posting.

FB40? Would like to hear from you... where are u?
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  So Embarrassed ... PLEASE HELP Post #10 (permalink)  
Old August 9th, 2007, 10:01 PM
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Hi FB40, i went down to see my consultant 2 days ago for a review after my second bloodtest and i enquired about maintainence programme (tho i'm still far fr my goal wt ). he was kind enough to show me a booklet with that info.

in our country, the maintainence programme comes together with the refeeding one.

i remembered that if you wish to stick to the same original plan, you must not have gained more than 4kg and also not after a duration of 2 to 3 years break from the programme. not sure if this info help in anyway.

do keep us posted on your progress, i'm sure you can do it!
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  So Embarrassed ... PLEASE HELP Post #11 (permalink)  
Old August 13th, 2007, 03:56 AM
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It's not easy

Hi FB40

I have completed Cohens successfully but what I have come to realise 5 months later is that weight loss is "ALWAYS" going to be an on going struggle for me. I know I can lose the weight but the problem for me is keeping it off. I have gained since finishing the plan but I go back on the diet and find the weight comes off fairly quickly using my original plan.

My advice would be to go back on your original Cohens plan.
Mentally prepare yourself in advance and also make sure you have no tempation around and have all your Cohens ingredients bought and weighed ready for you to prepare your meals. Also give yourself time to adjust to your new eating routine and if you do find you have deviated just DON'T let it take over and derail you completely. Jump back onto that wagon.

I think it's important that you do not give yourself a hard time about the weight gain and don't worry about what other's will think. Try and regain the focus and keep trying to get back on the plan, you say that you have started an exercise programme so this shows you are serious, so all you need now is to complete the next step and give away those wines and other bad foods which have made you regain your weight and "get with the programme".

It's not easy losing weight it takes alot of hard work and dedication to succeed and it doesn't help when their are temptations surrounding us at every shopping mall, coffee shop,bakery etc etc. (You know wht I mean)
but those shops and eateries are always going to be there so keep that in mind. And you can always have those things as a treat after you have reached you goal weight. By the way I lost 15kg on Cohens and I'll be 40 next year. My Goal was to be slim before turning 40. I also realise this will be an on going goal for the rest of my life.

So goodluck with it all FB40 let us know how you go. Remember you are not alone and keep posting.

Sam
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  So Embarrassed ... PLEASE HELP Post #12 (permalink)  
Old August 16th, 2007, 02:50 AM
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just want to say you're in good company. I'm going thru exactly the same thing right now.
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  So Embarrassed ... PLEASE HELP Post #13 (permalink)  
Old August 18th, 2007, 11:23 AM
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Fitby40....be strong. If you lost the weight before..you can loose it now. Fail forward - if you have failed, let it be a lesson for you not to go on this path again. Be strong, get rid of the weight, we are all here for you. It's easy for other's to say "you'r loosing weight too fast...you look nice with weight on" etc...casue they are not fat themselves. For those of us who are...we need to stop feeling sorry for ourselves and fight our battles with full force. Please stick to Cohen's and stay fit. I understand what your going thru....Im there as well .....but now I WILL start again and stay strong Best of luck...we are all behind you!
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  So Embarrassed ... PLEASE HELP Post #14 (permalink)  
Old August 19th, 2007, 05:14 AM
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Just me again. If you want to feel better, read my diary. I've lost count of the times I've done this, but hey it works. I always used to throw out my fat clothes, but this time I'm not, because I know myself. That may not sound very encouraging, but I figure, if I have some nice clothes to wear, if I put weight on again, I wont wait so long to get back to doing what I know is good for me again.
There's nothing worse than putting on weight, and dagging around in trakkies because there is nothing else in the wardrobe. Not a real morale booster. You will feel better once you start back on the right path. It's a much better feeling than doing nothing about it and worrying. There are lots of people who go through this. Don't be embarrassed. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. Your happiness is what matters
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