I have been kicking around the idea of this thread for awhile now, and after this weekend, I decided to do a little writeup and educate everyone on Bar Etiquette.

I have worked as a bouncer at a couple different bars to pick up some extra cash for awhile now. It has become apparent that some people just don't know how to act at a bar, and it is my hope that a little bit of education is going to save me and bar workers across the world a lot of frustration.

Entering the bar
As I'm a bouncer, this is where most of my gripes come from, so I'll go ahead and make this the biggest section. If you want to get into a bar that has a doorman (what bouncers are called now thanks to Roadhouse), certain things can grease the cogs a lot more than other things.

Everyone
If there is a line, wait in it patiently, and talk to your friends. Smile and act happy when you get to the front of the line. If the bar you are entering isn't your local college dive bar where a notecard saying "yes, I'm 21" gets you in, have your ID out of the "superglue sleeve," so I don't have to wait 20 minutes for you to get it out. MOST importantly... if you are drunk, try to be as sober-looking as possible. Not SOMBER, but SOBER. It is my job to make sure that someone that is already falling over doesn't get in, 'cause that just means I'm going to have to go in and drag them out thirty minutes later. Again, smile... I have to deal with hundreds on hundreds of people each night. One smile in a night full of assholes, and your face gets remembered for next time when I'll just wave you in.

Older People
If you are 35 and over, and a man, please have grey hair. If you don't have grey hair, I will probably card you because if I don't, I will have my manager up my ass, even though he knows that you are a good 10 years older than him. Women, please walk in with men that have grey hair. If there is no line, and time permits, I will most likely card you in a friendly way just to make sure you are already walking in to the bar in a good mood (means better tips for everyone involved), and to hear you say "oooh, you are SUCH a good boy!" Men: Don't get upset if I don't card you... you are not an older woman, and need to act like you have a pair, even if it doesn't work anymore.

Younger People (of age)
I really don't care if you are 24, and you think you are OBVIOUSLY over the legal drinking age. I'm still going to card you. No grey hair = show me the ID. I know that the bouncers at that bar you used to go to when you were underage with your fake barely even looked at the IDs, but anyone that looks under 30, and/or has a date on their card under 27 is going to get a thorough check at a real bar. If I let an underage person through, I lose my job. As a point, the ONLY people that complain about getting carded harder than a regular glance are the people that are either underage or just turned 21. Saying "She is old enough, man" does absolutely nothing, and does not speed up the process one bit. Also, know that if you look/act like the stereotypical frat boy/sorority girl, you are going to go through much harsher scrutiny. 90% of the problems that happen at bars aren't the men with the corn rows or tattoos on their face, or 80 piercings, or Misfits t-shirt... they are the men with croakies and frog-skin oakleys late at night with the popped collar and rainbow sandals.

Younger People (not of age)
Look happy, not nervous. Know your ID inside and out. Make sure that the people you are with don't wait around once they get inside (that is a dead giveaway). If you can't grow real facial hair, get a clean shave. Tag along with a group of slightly older people if you can for some cred. Most importantly: Know the bar you are going to. Don't try to take a crappy laminate or bleach to the bar that cards hard, you'll just lose it.

Tipping
Some people have heard to calculate a tip on a meal, you subtract things like drinks, then do your % on the food itself. When you go to a bar to eat lunch, then leave at 11pm that night after drinking 5 kegs of beer yourself, that rule is not in effect. A good rule of thumb to go by is at least $1/beer if you go up to the bar to get it, and more than that if a waitress brings it to you. If you plan to go back to a bar more than once, leave a sizeable tip your first time. The waitresses remember the faces of every awesome tipper, and they remember who the poor tippers were. Don't shoot yourself in the foot by leaving a poor tip at a place where you plan to go back to.

Not Getting Kicked Out
These are the following things that I have had to remove people from the bar for doing. This will be an updated list.
-Sleeping on the bar
-Sleeping on the floor
-Pulling your pants down to prove how big it is to anyone who cares
-Spanking a waitress
-Putting your hands into other peoples' beers
-Giving the manager's girlfriend shit
-Giving the manager shit
-Giving me shit
-Describing your fantasy which includes the bartender to the bartender in question
-Being a Sabers fan
-Your friend is a Sabers fan
-Being rude for no reason
-Tearing up menus and acting like a child throwing a tempertantrum

With all the people on these boards, lets get some bartenders/waitresses to leave some more thoughts on how to act, and get that information out there on how to not be considered a class-A jerk at a bar.

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Do you spend your days counting the hours you're awake
and when night covers the sky you find yourself doing the same
MH4L

LMAO! As a former waitress, I can appreciate this post.

Here's a tip on tipping--if you get a discount on your bill, whether via coupon or birthday deal, etc--don't subtract that discount from the tip. The server still served you the food and shouldn't get stiffed b/c of it. Like a buy one dinner get one free--don't tip for just the one dinner. Add extra for the one you ate but didn't pay for.

Don't blame your server for the kitchen's screw up and take it out of their tip. If you have an issue with your food that isn't your server's fault--take it up with management.

If you're in a restaurant with your children, don't let them run around. Not only do they drive other diners crazy, they could run into a server carrying a heavy tray full of hot food that could land on top of your brat.

One last thing--If I'm your waitress, feel free to spank me--just don't pinch.

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So basically, you want me to stop doing all things that make drinking in public fun...

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"There's not a lot of difference between a fox whole and a grave, but knowing that you dug your ditch and climbed in anyway."

I have a problem tipping based on meal percentage. It takes a waiter/waitress the same time and energy to bring me a $20 steak meal as it does to bring me a $7 hamburger. I try to tip on service and if the service has been outstanding, then there will be an outstanding tip, if the service was average, there will be an average tip. If it was mediocre, there will be a mediocre tip. With both the first and third options, I also leave comments on the bill on why I left the tip that I did.


As far as bar service, I can't see tipping $1 because a 12 oz beer was opened and handed to me. If there is extra effort for a mixed drink etc, I understand - that takes knowledge. But I don't go to bars much, in fact, the last bar I went to that had a doorman (bouncer) was in Dec 2006 in Atlantic City.

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SW:174CW:151.2GW:140

Friday night I went out for a quick beer with the guys from work - everyone got proofed - BUTMY OLD ASS... Sucked!!! Yeah I know i'm old...


One o f the last times I was in a bar -some ditzy blonde bimbette threw up on my shoes - she was not kicked out - she was totally fussed over.. and me -I was left with a pair of puked on ruined suede shoes... she should have been killed for stupidity...

The above list seems to apply to men only... females do plenty og stupid crap to get them kicked out...

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Tipping the bartender like that is 'cause they are most likely going to have a big mass of people yelling at them for drinks at one point or another during the night, and that is when they're not pouring the drinks for the waiters, and you want that bartender to know that serving you is going to get him something.

A BIG thing that some people don't get with tipping is tipping friends. If you go to a bar to visit a friend who works there, chances are you are going to be getting a couple of your beers knocked off for free. A good friend will calculate half of the free stuff that their friend voided for them, and tip them that. A best friend will calculate all of the free stuff that was given to them, and tip them that.

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Do you spend your days counting the hours you're awake
and when night covers the sky you find yourself doing the same
MH4L

I'll tip more for friendly service... That means. If the waitress charms me and not my super handsome husband... She will get a good tip.

Pay extra attention to my children... You'll get a great tip....

Ma'am me ...... I'll put a hex on you and you'll get a lousy tip.... lol

I was probably in Atlantic City in December 2006 also.

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How Sweet It Is

Me and the girls (friends, not boobs) were there like Dec 7-11 or something like that.

We were all over the place. I think I slept like 8 hours total from Thursday-Sunday, but we had a pretty good time. Next time I go with the girls, I'll definitely be much more choosy about who is invited AND it'll be in the summa summa summa-time.

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SW:174CW:151.2GW:140

So if your bill is $50 what would you consider to be an outstanding tip?

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$10 to $12

As far as outstanding goes, that may mean something different to me than it does to you or any other person. I also don't think servers should expect everyone to have it in their budget to leave really good tips. Hubby and I are in a one income household right now because of my schooling, so outstanding at this point is what I listed above - which does take into consideration my finances, the amount I go out to eat, and our satisfaction of the server.

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SW:174CW:151.2GW:140

They don't expect everyone has it in their budget to leave really good tips. They know that in a typical 6 hour shift they'll get at least a couple of tables that don't tip anywhere near 10%, no matter how friendly or good they are. In your reference, $10 on a $50 meal is a 20% tip (a good tip). The change in 5% from 15% to 20% cost you $2.50. If you are claiming budgetary concerns for potentially not leaving 4.1% of your total amount (2.5 / 60), then you should probably look into going someplace cheaper, or not ordering drinks. Wait staff payment shouldn't depend on what you make, but services rendered.

Remember: when you tip them, that is their income, not just something extra for them to tuck into their pocket.

You would hate me, then. Ma'am is a comma to me, and I can't break the habit, no matter how many times I get yelled at.

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Do you spend your days counting the hours you're awake
and when night covers the sky you find yourself doing the same
MH4L

and the majority of them don't pay the full tax on those earnings so they still come out somewhat ahead...

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The question phrased to me was about a tip for outstanding service on a $50 bill. No where in there was a specific break down of what the bill consist of and if I can't afford a $50 meal plus tip, I wouldn't go eat at an establishment that costs that much.

I recently left a tip of $15.xx on a meal of $60, so I don't think I'm a bad tipper when I get great service. I know what my budget consists of, and as you said 20% is a good tip, so don't suggest that I go somewhere cheaper because I consider my finances and look at prices before I visit an establishment.

All I was saying with the "my finances statement" is that someone who makes a hell of a lot more money than we do may leave a better (than 20% for great service) tip because they have the money to do that.

There is a certain expectation by consumers when dining out, because the job of the server is to SERVE. Additionally, servers should understand the job they are taking when they take it. They realize they are making 2.15 an hour or whatever it is now and that there will be slow nights where they make only minimum wage (at least I think most states now require restaurants to insure that they make at least that amount by the end of the night), and there will be times when they can make more than minimum wage.

But if they want a guaranteed wage, perhaps they are in the wrong business.


I never ever leave less than 10% even with shitty service. But I almost always back the tax out of the % amoun