Boob or not, you have an amazing wealth of knowledge and we are very lucky you are willing to share it with the rest of us. I know I am!!!

Wait, are you calling me a boob!?



Thanks for the kind words, Ali.

Of the two mainstream diet books that are on the market - You on a Diet and The Beck Diet Solution - both (of which I find a trifle irritating to read but the concepts in them are fairly sound - at least according to my limited knowledge) Beck more so, but You devotes a chapter to it.. as to the Whys...

Why do you want to lose weight - -the You book really delves into the mind portion.. why do you want to lose weight - and based on each answer given - it asks another Why question -and in a lot of cases it takes you to an answer that is really not the usual I want to be healthy response that so many people give... it's an interesting exercise... beck's book suggests keeping your lists of Whys (and she says your reasons can be totally shallow (like I want to wear sexy lingerie) to the I want to dance atmy grandchild's wedding... handy and visible to you every day...

That's one particular technique I've used in the past with not only clients, but myself. It's good to hear that a mainstream book is promoting such tactics.

If you keep asking yourself why until you can't answer the question anymore, you've reached some foundational answers that *should* help fuel your momentum and keep it consistent.

My why-list was pretty long with corresponding answers. This list I read pretty much every single day. I've modified it as things changed, but nonetheless, it definitely is something that helps keep me driven.

One of the answers to my foundational why questions for instance was the desire to be a super-hero-esque type of dad. I want to a have a son that looks up to his father and every possible sense. Of course acting the role is primary. But I think looking the role is pretty damn awesome too.... just thinking about it makes me want to push harder.

I like that why... that's very cool...

well this kind of reminded me of my why. and i realized i have much more reasons now then when i started this 'journey' last year. but why did i get lost along the way? i guess it was more convenient. or we just get scared too much. i'm still scared like hell of losing weight. i guess tat feeling won't go away until i do lose weight, no matter how much i tackle the issues that bother me.

in the fear of thin thread that's been here for a while - that's a good lesson to do to -why you don't want to lose weight - that gives as interesting an answer as why you do...

yeah i agree, and i did start my diary with the why last year...and i think i will have to do it all over again, because some answers have changed. which is always good hehe. but maybe i should print it out and put it somewhere on the wall.

Remember, it's good to read you 'why' or 'whys' frequently. I shit you not that I do this daily. So much emotion is tied to my 'whys' that it's almost impossible to not be consistent.

The only time my training and diet slips is when I get lazy and stop doing things like reading my 'whys'.

and having those whys be the honest whys - the ones you really believe in...

not the ones you tell people because you think it's what you should be saying

is even more helpful...

That's an extremely good point Mal.

It seems intuitive, but many don't even realize it.

Doing this right takes a high level of self-analysis and extreme honesty with yourself.

This got me thinking...I haven't done a list of my why's (which I think I will now) but one of mine, since we are being honest here, is to get more respect.

It is sad to say that people treat you differently when you are heavy, they are more dismissive and sometimes you are treated as invisible. The only reason I am commenting on it is that I am in a profession where your reputation is extremely important to your success and I don't want my weight dragging me down or holding me back.

Respect is a funny thing. I normally don't like having something that's not in my control play such an important role such as establishing my drive. What I mean is, people (not necessarily you) can lose a ton of weight and still get no respect from others due to whatever reasons.

Then where does that leave you?

In most cases more depressed than you were before since you were banking so heavily on a change.

However, there are exceptions. Another of my foundational 'whys' is the desire to earn the respect of my clients in the trainer-client relationships I have. I want my peers, as well as my clients, to know that I not only talk the talk.... but also walk the walk.

So I do see your point. I guess my point is, you have to be careful in what you choose to be your 'whys'. But I'm certainly not one to tell you if it's right or wrong. After all, they are your 'whys'.

i completely agree... i have so many whys..i lost some on the way because i dealt with them or i have changed so much i don't know. my newest why is actually to lose weight so i that once i get pregnant in the future )one can hope ) i can have a more healthy pregnancy in the future and to be an active mom. i guess maternity faze has kicked in hehe.
there are many more and you're right. i need to read them more often. and i will.

I completey understand about people not respecting me regardless of how I look, I think what I meant to say (and worded badly) was that I don't want people do disregard what I say on some level because of my appearance.


This is more where I am coming from. I'm an attorney so I deal with lots of people and reputation is crucial. I guess I would just feel comfortable knowing that my appearance is not a roadblock to taking me seriously. If someone doesn't like me for me, hey, that's fine, but for them to discount something I am saying because of how I look, that's another thing. I know I can't control it but since we were talking about whys I thought I would put one of my more shallow ones out there.

I have others that are much more reasonable