i'm just wondering how do u all keep ur spirits high and keep pushing yourselves to achieve ur goals even though ur weight loss may have reached a plateau and stuff.. cos i get demoralized very easily.. also when i went overseas to visit my relatives last week almost all of them openly commented that i've gained weight, grown chubbier, blah.. their comments really hurt and makes me feel like giving up... i was really very embarassed whenever they made such comments! totally sucks.. it makes me lose confidence in myself and everything that i do... whenever i hang around with super skinny friends i feel so inferior.. i dont dare to wear sleeveless clothes so as not to show my big arms.. i hate feeling this way but i just can't help it.. can anyone help?

No matter what size you are at - but especially when you are losing weight or trying to - you should have one outfit that makes you feel really good about yourself... Don't hide in oversized clothes or baggy clothes...

the neighborhood I live in is populated with gay men and 20 something size 4 straight shiney haired waspy chicks... well i'm not 20 something anymore, I will never be a size 4 and I will probably never have straight hair unless i'm walking out of the hair salon... I have to tell myself that I can't be concerned about what other people are because they have their own issues - i can only do what I can do for me.

Ah families - you can't pick them - you can't shoot them unfortunately. Last time i saw my family - I still only hear about what I've done wrong my entire life - I could cure cancer tomorrow and I'd hear about how i blew curfew the night of my senior prom...

All you can do is be concerned about yourself and remind yourself of your goals - why do you want to lose weight... and keep focused on your goals and don't worry somuch about what others say or think.. People are always going to find fault... Listen to them - process it and either take it on board if it helps or throw it over if it doesn't Your families comments that you've gained weight need to be thrown overboard - you know that and you don't need them to remind you.

Just keep focused on you.

Surrounding yourself with a "family of choice"; people you WANT to be around, will make a huge difference. As for insults from family members or cruel comments from people you have to see, well, I'm a bit more confrontational than most. I don't let that kind of thing slide, I remind them "If you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all. Does that sound familiar?" Or something actually mean if I don't like them.

You don't have to put up with those sorts of statements; but IF you choose to do so, keep this in mind: People usually say hurtful things about the things they fear, or the traits they dislike most about themselves.

I'd like to suggest that one of your problems is a matter of learning to deal with your own feelings and jealousies (of your skinnier friends) and not knowing what you are supposed to feel. If you have some form of counseling available, I really recommend taking advantage of it, and talking to someone.

If you have health coverage; you can often talk to a nutritionist as a part of your care. It is one of the best things I ever did; I had the insurance and I was able to go talk weekly and weigh in, learn, plan foods and meals, and was kept FAR more accountable for my actions. I was not successful in keeping weight off, but I learned a lot; and hopefully it will help me even now.

Personally what has helped me when I feel down is to read up more on nutrition and exercise. Although I'm not to the point where I'm totally obsessed with it, the more knowledge I gain, the better I feel in control of my weight and fitness situation.

Try getting a step meter to keep track of the steps you take in a day. Try increasing that each day or each couple of days. It's a short term goal that you can achieve on a daily basis.

Your low confidence is unmotivating you which is pretty common in the beginning as you start to see results and changes in your body. It gets much better, trust me.

I might be starting out, but one thing that keeps me going, is always telling myself the reasons for wanting to lose the weight everytime i hit a brick wall. surround yourself by loving friends and family. and remember friends are family too.

Weighing myself every day seems to get me motivated. I know, I know....EVERYONE says NOT to do it and that it isnt really the right way to gauge my weight but when I lose any weight, it gets my spirits up and when I gain weight or stay the same...it gets me MORE motivated to work on cutting out the bad things.

To each his own I guess

As Mal suggested - focus on yourself, not on the negative comments of others. You are letting that build into a negative self-image.

My suggestion is to also focus on the person that you want to be. The chances are that is the real you.

To keep myself motivated is easy ~ I love health and fitness, reading everything I can, and hitting the gym.

Dont give up because they gave you negative comments. Just know that the next time you see them you will look much better and they will be wowed.

I just looked at the other posts you've made, and you are very encouraging and positive! Try to listen to your own words sometime, and treat yourself like you treat others!

For me, I keep pictures that remind me of what I want. Like my desktop background is a picture of a dress I'd die to wear, but not until I lose weight!

hmm sorrie this is rather late.. but thanks a lot for ur encouraging comments! really appreciate me.. may the force be with us!~ =)