So several years ago I was watching Oprah and Dr.Phil was her weekly guestspeaker at the time, he asked an audience member (several there for weight loss advice) and he asked "do you have stretchy pants" and the woman said "yes", Dr.Phil responded by "You're fat 'cause you wanna be fat". Yes people buy stretchy pants so when needed they can expand according to meal but they also make your ass look really good.

yesterday i did a little synopsis of my day and my frustration with my dependence on food but this is me... I'm jenny and i live in san antonio and well even thought i wasn't born in SA i do call it home, my parents live several hours away in my hometown. I fulltime work for a non-profit and I go to graduate school at 3 nights a week, yes my days are long and I am tired. I was always a skinny child, but one summer i spent w/ my grandma she fed me so much that i gained about 25 lbs (2nd to 3rd grade), my grandma being the mexican american prepared tacos, tortillas, rice, beans, etc and she spoiled me so much that we would have like baskin robbins at least 3 times a week. So my weight issues started early, i wore bigger sizes that my aunt, shopping in the juniors section while everyone still wore children sizes wasnt fun, i had blocked out the memory of shopping in Sears Plus for girls but that came back several years ago. Ok so i was a chubby girl in til around late of my junior year, i went to the dr he told me i was going to become diabetic because "i ate too many sweets, i came home and ate candy bars", the dr was a jackass . i was fat because i would eat burgers, fries, mexican food at like 10 at night and i was not active. ok, so i joined a gym at 190lbs and lost about 40 lbs and dropped to my lowest of 129 my senior year in HS, i felt great, but my grandparents passed away so i ate to help with my sadness, but i didnt gain that much back. ok, here is where the weight gain started, i went away to college and the freshman 15 hit, i was lazy and spent lost of time in the cafeteria, curly fries were my weakness. Every year i gained 10/15 lbs,no doubt due to drinking and late night food runs, finally 3.5 years later i graduated and was heavier, i was back to my old high school days. sucks, all that work and i gained it all back. well it took me several months to find a job, after living back at home after graduation i moved back to SA and here i am been working for several months but within that time i have gained even more weight back and it sucks.i'm guessing i'm back at around 180lbs. i feel soo fat and soo unwanted and soo depressed. i dont like going out much when i do i put up a front mainly using jokes and humor to make fun of myself becasue inside i know people are thinking it. I dont have the greatest of body image and low self esteem i dont want to feel like this anymore but i dont have time to get active which i know is key but oh well this is hwere i am gonna start i'm just gonna vent and try to work it out, and i need to start eating healthier..the list goes on and on but i need to stop talking and start doing i hope this forum can help me to just get things off my chest and to maybe find other people i can relate with.i'm in my early 20s and should be having the time of my life, crazy nights out on the town and torrid love affairs (ok, not really but you get the idea), finding myself, etc. Oh yeah and i need to stop relying on Spanx to make me feel thinner..fyi i love them as much as i love stretchy pants. thanks to those who read this through...

Hi Hopeful,
Welcome to the WLF and to your diary.

Taking the first step, truly is the hardest!

There are so many points I wanted to touch on...first and foremost...

**You are NOT your weight, your weight is a snapshot of where you are in time. Nothing more. You are so, so much more then the number on the scale. **

Losing weight is mostly a matter of nutrition. I've heard said, 90% of weightloss is through diet managment.

So it's time to learn managment skills.

If you haven't already done so, check out FitDay - Free Weight Loss and Diet Journal or Free Diet Plans at SparkPeople both are sites for tracking calories, nutrition and fitness. Learning how much you're consuming will put the control back into your hands for managing your diet.

Make small changes at a time - biting off more then you can chew is a good way to get overwhelmed.

And remember, weight loss is a slow process, but you CAN do it. It's one pound, one day and sometimes one meal at a time.

Welcome!

I wanted to come by and say hi. I know the feeling of being uncomfortable in your skin and wanting to make fun of yourself because you are sure that someone MUST be thinking it....but, please don't do that anymore.

A big part of the battle for those of us who have dealt with weight issues...is the mental and emotional piece of it. Thinking positive, doing good (healthy things) things for ourselves, being with supportive people are really good ways to help. Each step I take on the treadmill is a good thing...that is how I look at it...each time I walk further, eat better, make a good choice...all help me.

You have to MAKE YOU the priority. Make time to exercise...give something else up. Start with 30 minutes out of your day...take a walk. Trust me when I say that once you make that committment and have established it as a pattern....you will feel so much better about yourself and that will keep you motivated.

You can do this! One day at a time..go for it!