Alright Mr. Diary.. Here goes.

After eating a box(16 to be exact) of oreos yesterday I decided its time to start laying it all out on paper(or the internet as it be) Hopefully writing down my weight loss goals will help me achieve them!

I have no idea why I binge and sabatoge myself, but today it's going to stop!

Enough with my Negativity and a bit about myself(In case anyone ends up looking over this little diary of mine!)

I'm a 22 year old Canadian girl who currently lives in the Netherlands as a live in Nanny. I take the kids to school by bike in the morning and collect them five hours later (by bike again) four days a week. I watch the kids for 3.5 hours untill their mom gets home and cooks up dinner for all of us. The other three days of the week I am off. I have about an hour to three hours of housework to do during the days that I do work.

I have a membership to a gym here and only do cardio while I am there. The gym man told me that cycling is the best form of excersise and that I should keep my heart rate at around 130 if I'm looking to lose wieght. I usually can do 50 minutes on the bike and 50 on the elliptical when I go. My gym sceduele is overly sporatic.. I go for 6 days straight then come up with excuses(currently I'm sick.. yuck) and wont go for a week! I need to feel more motivated to go!

I wieght somewhere between 185-195pnds.. it always fluctuates! I gained 20 pounds in college and I really want it gone! I feel most self consious about my spare tire(where all of it lies!) and my more recently bigger arms.. I'd like to be a healthy 145-155. but any loss is a bonus for me! Plus I want to be able to run!

I try to eat well and have control over what I eat during the day, usually a sandwich and some soup.. with some cereal.. and maybe some chocolate.. But dont have much say in the meal at dinner time(what I do have say in is how much I consume and of what part..) I used to be a soda freak, but have stopped since I moved to Europe.. YAY! first accomplishement I'd say..

Another huge Calorie adder is my drinking habits! I like going out on the weekends for a few!! gah.. need to find a low cal solution to this!!

I dont want to be completely negative! I just want to be healthier before I return to canada in May! oh, another HUGE weakness.. is cheese!! anyways.. im off to do some cleaning and have a cup-o-soup for lunch..

hopefully no more splurges!

hey welcome to your diary and the forum.

your excercise sounds amazing...i'd love it if i had that much staying power. i have to mix and match for 5-10 mins on everything otherwise i lose it after a few minutes!!

don't cut out the things you love. just ration them. treat this as alifestyle change otherwise from experience as soon as i reach a goal or start getting bad cravings i binge.

have you got a mini goal? they are good. i try to have a few mini goals. for me its every inch i lose and then treat myself once i get there (but not with food) lol.

good luck with your goals and the journey.

see you around

;-)

x

Thanks for the kind words and encouragment! A mini goal... I will need some time to come up with this.. but i think it's a great idea!

Why is it that when the kids I look after call me fat I am compelled to eat? I feel like by eating I am somehow justifying I'm not fat. Which just doesnt make any sense at all. In a bummed mood tonight.. looking forward to starting up at the gym again tomorrow..(I think my sickness is almost gone! youpee!)

good to hear the sickness is nearly gone. don't worry about what others say or think. ask yourself why you are doing this and stick to it and soonthe kids will be calling you skinny! lol

hope you don't feel bummed for long

;-)

x