OK.

Hi all who know me. I have decided to begin a new diary since my old one would need a major overhaul to get all the negativity out of it. When I began this journey I was not in a good place in my life and my diary reflected it.

I am now in maybe the best place my life has ever been. I am 34, married for 9 years to a beautiful woman who loves me, have a child on the way- jan '09 is the estimated date- and have made drastic changes in my lifestyle.

In Jan of this year when I started this I was 260-265, smoked 2-3 packs a day and played sports on occasion for exercise. I ate crap in amazing quantities and was going for a heart attack by 40 or so.

I am now 220 as of this morning. I have not smoked in 5 months. I exercise 5-6 times a week and eat 100% better than I ever have. I now have a positive outlook and realize that maybe life can be good.
It is not all about weight for me. I have severe self esteem issues stemming from my things from my childhood including weight- but not only weight. I have a image of myself of a fat loser. I am starting to get over that but it is still how it is in general for me.

So any way. New diary, new me.
My name is Brian BTW if anyone wants to say hi.

I have a picture thread titled Pictures of the fat man if you wish to se where I came from and where I am..
http://weight-loss.fitness.com/befor...s-fat-man.html


Have fun, play nice and talk to you all later.

I'm your first post sweetie

welcome to your new diary- your old one -has been closed to avoid slipping back into the negativitiy

enjoy your newness

Thanks Mal. Good to have friends in Mod places.

Wouldnt have expected anything less Ali.

Welcome to the 'new' me.
Well the first attempt at the 'new' me.

Glad to see the new diary. Keep up all the positive stuff or Mal will lock this one, too.

I dont doubt it. She'll keep locking them until I get it...

Thanks Trops.

*walks in and looks around* Hey! I like what you've done with the place! Oh! And you have chairs for each of us. *looks at the names* Here's mine! *plops down and gets*

I would have brought you a housewarming gift but I wasn't sure what you would like . . .

*walks in and sees Ange sitting in her chair flipping through a magazine...*

Hey girlfriend! How's it goin??? Mind if I hang with you while we wait for Brian to get back???

Don't worry, I didn't bring him a gift either, I figured he'd be happy to come home and see his friends waiting for him We can figure out gifts later

Thanks guys for making this feel like home.

OK. So the dreaded visit to the brothers house happened today. I have a tendency to overblow things. This was one. My brother and idiot in law both had normal reactions to my wife's pregnancy. Oh my brother had some snarky comments after the initial reaction but that was to be expected from him. His wife still does not understand all we went through to get pregnant but again- to be expected.
The issue is we were in the pool and on the deck and milling around and not one frickin comment about the obvious weight loss. I really cannot understand this.....
I mean0 it is 40 lbs for the love of Mike.....

Oh well- I know they noticed it. And again- I have a tendency to overblow things, I know shocking....- and this was one.

All in all a pleasant day although the weather here was interesting..

Hope everyone had a good weekend.
Thanks for reading my drivel.

Love your new diary title Bigguy!!

On the subject of family......well, I don't know how to fix them, but I can commiserate. My mother was always the type to let me know she didn't expect much from me, didn't expect others to much like me and was surprised by any positive feedback I received. My sister has taken up where my mother left off. I don't think she even realizes how much her off the cuff remarks hurt me...she's just parroting my mom.

My family has never acted as though a man was lucky to win my heart....they act like I'm lucky that I found a man stupid enough to put up with me...and then they are truly amazed that it's actually a man worth having.

I have no cure for family. All I can say is you can pick your nose, you can pick your friends...but you can't pick your family.

(even if you love them in spite of yourself and want their approval)

Thanks Judy.
I have heard the nose one, but never seen it in type/

That is so true about family. We have many parallels between ours.
Thanks again.

Hi sweetie!!!

Enjoying the new digs?

I am glad you had a decent day

It feels so odd being on page 1...... lonely to a point- liking the newness though.

Decent is probably the best way to describe it. Not special but not bad. Got 2 father's day cards though - although one was from evil cat so I take it with a grain of salt.

You back from Vacation? Back to the grind tomorrow?
If so... thats a shame...

BTW- Life is going to get in the way these next 2 weeks minimum and I will only be able to post here in the evenings most likely.
The other option is to quit my job but I have bills to pay so.....

Carry on without me as much this week.