THANKS BABE....it HIDES the HUGE arms....LMAO....PICS are DECIEVING!!

We all have stuff about us that we ourselves may not like but the pic isn't deceiving anyone about the fact you're beautiful. And I may not know you very well but from this forum it seems to me that goes for on the inside too. So no beatin yourself up!! lol

AWWWWWW...... AREN'T you a SWEEEETIE!!!

YOU too....very SWEET, MOTIVATED, and sound VERY DETERMINED!!!

I really APPRECIATE the comments...and I TOO have seen YOUR pics and HAVE been MEANING to tell you THAT YOU have VERY beautiful FEATURES yourself!!!!

YOU are ON YOUR way ALREADY woman, and NO ONE can STOP you NOW!!

So I've found myself thinking today about something new....something I don't think I really have allowed myself to think about in the past...what's it like after losing ALOT of weight? I was half tempted to post and ask some people. After seeing so many success stories I think it's actually sinking in that I fully intend to lose a substancial amount of weight....more even than the one time I lost 80lbs and was still very heavy. I'm actually wondering what it's going to feel like when I get under 200lbs...will things be different...I think they'd have to be. Although I've read a bunch of stuff lately that says don't have high expectations and think everything is going to be better. But honestly how can it not be better? While I don't think being thin is going to fix everything....I'm finally realizing being fat has been pretty horrible for me and robbed me of alot. I can thank the forum for that...for causing me to really think about stuff. It's a good thing for sure.

I've already posted a start for my before & after thread and I said I didn't have any pics of me at my highest. Well I realized today while I was packing that isn't true. Painful as it may be...I do have pics and they are of my wedding. The wedding I had at the court house because I didn't want to make a big deal and be a fat bride stuffed like a sausage in white satin. There's some awesome dresses out there but there's not alot they can do for somebody short like me, over 300 lbs and who gains it so much in my stomach. I seriously regret not having a wedding but it was going to be painful either way at this weight. I haven't posted the pics yet but I will when I also can post some improvement pics too, probably in about a month. I know I've lost weight but I want to see a drastic change. Honestly though I really think if I get down to my goal weight I'm going to do a vow renewel ceremony and find my perfect dress...even if we just go to a park and don't spend money on anything else. Every woman should get to wear a wedding dress and have their day...instead of like me wearing a brown tshirt and peasant skirt from walmart that I already had ;/.

Meh...I'm such a whiner, lol. It feels really good to get some of this off my chest sometimes but then I reread what I've wrote and expect violin music to pop up any moment. Too funny.

Anyway I'm starving...wasn't hungry all day after breakfast until now. I'm going to reheat a rotisserie chicken we picked up and add some veggies on the side before I have to go to work. I have the next two days off after this to get some more packing done...almost there and so close to getting in our first home...yay I'm so excited.

Ok so end result today:

Breakfast: 2 lc biscuits,
Sausage gravy
ham slice and scrambled eggs -----total 8 carbs

Lunch: none

Dinner: rotisserie chicken
steamed cauliflower and broccoli w/ butter -----total 4 carbs

Dessert: breyers low carb ice-cream ---- 12carbs

Total for the day: 24 carbs

oh yes! you really should have that second wedding!! how special would that be!?!

thanks for the support in my diary btw!! i didn't know you had a before and after thread started, i'll have to check it out

What a great idea to have a second wedding! A wonderful thing to aim for.

What's your perfect dress then, if not a t shirt and a skirt? Sounds okay to me! (:

Hey,
I think the thoughts you are having are healthy and normal, and actually really good. I think its important to think consciously about how things will be different when you lose weight. It makes it seem more real. Which makes it seem more attainable. I only have 10 pounds left to go, but I struggle with picturing what it will be like when I get there, and what I will do then. It's almost like I never want to get there, because being on the journey is something I know how to do. So start picturing the end now. I think it can only help. And yes, every girl deserves a wedding in the dress of her choice. I'm not even engaged yet, but I still look forward to that day. I like the idea of renewing your vows. Keep up the good work. You can do it!

I'm so proud of you, good job with the cravings. Keep it up so you can get your perfect dress and vow renewal ceremony. You're doing great!

V

I love you guys! I started to say you all have no idea how much your support means to me but then I realized you probably exactly do, lol. I never thought I could meet so many great people in one place and especially not in a forum.

Oh and my new avatar...I like this pic of me but it's me about 25 pounds lighter in it than I am now so I guess I'm cheating. But I figure I'll be there soon enough :P

So I got off work a bit late this morning and a friend wanted me to go to breakfast with her and one of the girls we take care of. So even though I knew hubby would still be in bed I gave him a courtesy call....went something like this:

"Hey honey...just goin to breakfast with a friend so don't worry if you wake up and I'm not home yet...OH AND I'M NOT CHEATIN, love ya *pause*

OH I mean I'm not cheating on our diets....DAMN I mean I'm not cheatin on you either....crap...ok love ya bye

Apparently he had a good chuckle, then rolled over and went back to sleep. When I got home he said that I sounded as bad as his guy friends...digging a hole then burying myself tryin to talk my way out of it, lol. Oh and I really didn't cheat...amazingly after all those hashbrown & gravy cravings I stared hashbrowns in the face on their plates today and wasn't tempted. That made me happy

So anyway here's what I ate today:

Breakfast: eggs w/cheese, bacon, sausage, and a side salad w/ ranch before my breakfast came (I'm weird, it sounded good)

Lunch: chicken salad (chicken, mayo and some pickle), about a 10 pieces of pepperoni

For once I have absolutely NO idea what to fix for dinner so if anyone has any ideas

Today has been a great day btw, really enjoyed time with my friend. We ran some last minute papers in today for our house and looks like we'll be closing and getting the keys either Monday or Tuesday. I have the next two nights off and we're almost completely packed.

I'm really tired from so little sleep but really not willing to go to bed yet on my night off. I told myself I could have the night off from packing and stuff and to relax though. Hubby is at a friends but when he gets home I think we'll rent this movie that just hit pay-per-view that I've wanted to see. Tomorrow though it'll be finish up as much as I can at our apartment to move! YAY

Ok finishing up the day (I was too tired to cook)

Dinner: 2 light oscar meyer hot dogs

Dessert: breyers low carb icecream with Davinci sugar free carmel syrup (was so good)

Oh and I had a chocoperfection bar...two carbs. This is probably the only time I've had 12 chocolate bars sit in my cupboard this long. It's not that they are bad....they actually are decent and don't tear up my stomach and send me running for the bathroom like other s/f chocolate. But they're not quite as sweet and have an extra...waxy taste to them? I'm not sure waxy is the right word but it doesn't really melt in your mouth.

Too be honest I've eaten maybe 4 over the last month and everytime I do I keep thinking they have a familiar taste. Today I finally figured out why....well...see...ok when I was like 12 my mom would always buy the dog weird and fancy snacks. She bought dog chocolates and yea...I tried one, lol. Can't believe I admitted that but I'm sure it's not the worst thing I've eaten. So....the chocoperfection bars remind me of those dog chocolates, lmao. What can I say? The dog chocolates weren't that bad either.

Haha, that is one of the best stories ever about the chocolate and the dogs! Hahaha.

I'm sure you're going to look like such a knock out at your vow renewal ceremony! Whoo!

And if you run out of ideas for dinner again, one thing I really like to do is throw about a tablespoon of margarine in a frying pan, and put onions, carrots, celery, mushrooms (or any other veggies you like) and cook them along with a chicken breast. It's yummy yummy and SO good for ya. Another thing I tried lately was a fish called tilapia or something like that. It sounds like cancer, but it actually tastes pretty good and is low in calories! It's great with a little lemon on top.

LOL. The reason chocolate tastes waxy and doesnt melt in your mouth is because its made with shortening and not with natural cocao butter. That's a key difference in all chocolates. Hersheys verses Godiva chocolate for instance. It is what makes the quality of of chocolate higher or lower. ( I'm a culinary arts major in college) I hope they wouldnt give high quality chocolate to the dog. LOL. you have been doing so well. I'm glad you have found this forum so helpful.

I cannot call my food low carb because when I log my food through fitday it always says that my carbs are between 50% and 70% of my diet. Having said that I think that I eat low carb where it counts. We get a lot of carbs from fruit and veg and I eat tons of those which I think makes my carbs so high. I also eat quite a lot of cereal (which I really like and seem to help me somehow) but I try to go for cereal that is wholewheat and I have plenty milk. I have heard that it is ok to have carbs if I have protein with it.

I think that most people would think my food is low carb however because I have completely cut out pasta and rice. I also have pretty much cut out bread (although I have eaten it on a couple of occasions over the past year).

I use fry light a lot for cooking. It is a spray oil that is just one calorie per squirt and therefore uses little calories. I actually use the olive oil version of fry light.

For fat for doing things like baking fish I use olive spread. Obviously - since I dont eat bread there is no need for butter / margarine for that.

I havent tried those supplements so cannot comment on those. I do take a range of supplements already and feel quite good about the way that side of things is going. They are not specific for PCOS - but the supplements that I take are a multivitamin, omega-3 fishoil, zinc, starflower oil, garlic, high dose vitamin C and I take a calcium supplement if I think that my calcium will not make it to 1000mg for the day.

I found that I had to cut cheese completely out of my diet last spring as I was gaining weight every time that I ate any. I am not sure whether it is because of the sodium content or what - but I cut it out. A month ago I was persuaded to try cottage cheese and quark. Both of these have been ok for me - but they are the only forms of cheese that I have eaten for over a year. I suggest that you monitor how your body reacts to cheese.

Janice (Abbagirl) and I both swear that walking is a brilliant form of exercise for us. We both were apt to feel a little like we were living on an emotional knife edge (something about our hormones I guess). Anyway we both find that walking makes us feel tons more tranquil. And it has really helped our weight loss.

I tried to lose weight loads of times when I was young but could never get anywhere with it. Eventually I gave up and the hard lost pounds piled all back on again. I have finally got my weight down to a "normal" BMI - but I will be 49 years old later this month so it has come too late to sort out my fertility issues. I really wish that I could have managed to do this when I was younger.