That's so awesome Kaitie! I'm so happy for you! I'm going to wait until the next month, when I hope to be down a size, and get myself one new pair of jeans. Normally I buy them second hand in town, and none of them fit perfectly. I can't wait!

you are going really well - i'm just checking in to say good luck with the 6 week challenge, but it seems you are already well on the way!

Thanks a bunch sheidi!! I'm sure we'll both have great results on October 2!

Ok, some random things going through my brain:

Of course as soon as I set out all of our tarps to dry it starts to rain

T2 got me thinking about how much of an oddity it is for me and John to be trying to lose weight together. It's not the first time we've tried this but I'm sure it's going to be the last. I can't stand being with him at this weight. We can't do anything--unless it's him sitting in front of the damn tv watching car show after car show while guzzling down diet soda. At least it's diet soda now but does he have to drink the whole f-ing thing (2 liter bottles of course)? I still have half a 16 ounce bottle of soda in the fridge from Tuesday! Yes, he's lost 12 pounds and yes he's going to the gym and yes he's eating a crap load less but something about drinking seven 2 liter bottles of soda in one week is wrong. I tried to tell him to drink less and he says 'but it has no calories!' I told him about the sodium and how it makes you retain water and that's why he's got these nasty-ass pus balls all over his lower legs but I don't think it sunk in. Last night he went to get milk and came home with more soda. It's frustrating. T2 if your reading this: what are some ideas that you can give me to help him lose the weight faster? It's been a month and yes he's dropped 12 pounds in a month but didn't you lose more faster? Maybe I'm just desperate. John's probably the nicest guy in the world--and I'd imagine he's a really handsome fellow at a normal weight--I mean he was a cutey when we got married and he was about 360--but now, it's just to sad to even think about. Maybe once school starts again he'll start burning more calories (b/c he won't be sitting on a freakin' couch all day) and the weight will come off faster. I'm hoping that he can be between 430 and 440 by Christmas.

Ok, I've got to stop thinking about it b/c it always makes me really sad and a little mad. I'll write happier things later.

Hi Kaitie,
sounds like you get frustrated sometimes about your husband's habits. It is difficult watching the people we love destroy themselves. I hope that your husband takes your advice seriously and knows that you are concerned because you care about him.

As for your weight loss, keep up the good work !

Kaitie,
Motivating someone else to loose weight can be very frustrating, esp. since they may not realize things they do are hurting themselves. My best advice - educate. I think diet drinks have been linked to delaying or preventing weight loss, and other negative health effects. But its very hard to change a person unless the person wants to change themselves.
Good luck! Still, 12 lbs is pretty good in 1 month. You have to also celebrate the achievements. Keep encauraging, and things will go well!

I gues it must suck to be in your position. Its hard to see somebody you love killing themselves slowly.
There isnt much you can do other than to tell him exactly what you said here. You cant make the choice for him or do it for him, much as you want to protect him. Its a bit like being a mother and seeing your kids make a mistake. You can only show them the way - and not make them do it.

I ratted him out to the trainer today when they met to discuss nutrition goals...so hopefully he'll listen to the trainer.

My exercises went well. I was going to do 6 miles on the bike but my legs could hardly do the 5...I had to stop twice! Sit-ups are fine, I can feel my abs working so after Sunday (my day of rest) I should see a difference, even if it's a teeny little bit.

Anyone have any good exercises or know of any machines at the gym to work on love handles? Mine are seriously out of control!

Thanks!

get a swiss ball, lie on it sideways with your hips on the ball and upper half in the air. Make your upper half go up and down with your hands behind your head

I think its probably just fat though and will go when you loose some more weight.

I don't know what a swiss ball is, but they have these balls at my gym that come in different weights. You sit on the floor with our knees up, feet flat on the floor. You then hold the ball and take it from side to side keeping it very close to your body. That really gets the sides.

Sorry to hear about your frustrations with your husband. Just keep supporting him and letting him know how you are feeling about it. Sounds like he has made some good first steps.

I agree with Pineola... medicine balls are really supposed to help a lot with love handles!

Your husband is lucky to have such a great support system in you!

I think it's unique. Let's face it, not many women would stay, love, support and tolerate a 500 pound man. Your first post on here captured my heart for the mere fact you were with John in his state. My initial thoughts were "he's a lucky man and she's a very special woman".


Is this an ultimatum ?? It could work but in all likelihood it will only cripple his spirits (and yours further). I would like to think his fears about dying young would be his biggest motivator but losing a woman who loves him may make him give up completely.

Currently he is trying, I hope you're willing to ride this out for awhile with open communication and an affirmation you no longer bear guilt to the consequences for his failure. The 'meet me halfway' approach is worth a shot dontcha think ??

This would be a time where I would remind him of his lack of motivation. I know in my morbidly obese state, TV was my life (and pc too) and really that's all I cared to do until I found my motivation.

I hope you can give John some latitude on his energy levels or lack of. It must be extremely difficult to maintain at his size. Again, enter into open conversation if and when you think he's slacking, eating wrong, missing workouts, etc.. Only you can gauge his efforts. I think there are more results to be seen than just a number on a scale. Evaluate his day-to-day changes and consistency and be fair and also be fair in recognizing that the days you slip up too - hey, it happens.
The effort is being made and the results are starting to happen. Perhaps you want to see a lil more wallop out of his results but give it time, he's at least started. Soon you two will see the results and it may be the very thing that makes John set his sails.

I know seeing my weight loss made it that much more motivating. I hope you two get to enjoy this phase of lifestyle changes



Big man, small steps.

I see where you're coming from. You see this from a self-control standpoint and I wouldn't disagree with you, morbidly obese people need to find self-control to succeed in lifestyle change. I like your awareness even more. It says you're keeping score, you care, you're monitoring him - that's a nice aid to have in a joint effort. Like I've said before, John is a lucky man that you care about these things.

In this case, it sounds like John has classic circulation problems in his legs consistent with what the morbidly obese get. I would hope you have medical evidence that supports peripheral edema is connected to diet soda. One 2 liter cares 8% of the daily requirement of sodium, in the sodium world, that's pretty hard to beat.

Personally, my circulation improved hugely from walking and being motivated to do it every single day. I drink diet soda every single day too - usually 5 -2 liters a week, At this point, the good is he's off the sugar danger part, the bad is he's not showing self-control (in your eyes). Once John finds the motivation to exercise off the weight and his circulation improves, you'll tend to forget about the drink of choice and smile that he's doing better in general.

Yes, I did drop much more faster, but I am a warrior. I saw I was in a fight for my life and it motivated me to come out fighting. I lost over 60 lbs the first 2 months..

but...

I didn't have it as bad as John and I'm sure my ability was probably a little more available to me. It didn't take me too long to build up from 10 minutes a day of walking to 75 minutes
.

I can give John some wiggle room on distance and time, but I sure couldn't accept him not walking everyday. If he's motivated, he'll be out there every day kickin' ass and taking weight off.

Tips: I have to be careful here. My method isn't for everyone. I would highly suggest a planned ADA diet but a doctor should appoint the calorie level, be it 1200 or 1500 or 1800 a day, at John's size, a good dietician may start him out at 2000 a day - not my field of expertise.

The 'go it alone' warrior-like-I-did plan is low-cal, low-carb and I eat catabolics 4-6 times a day to stave of hunger, and walk walk walk.
No, IMO John is desperate, you're frustrated - and understandably.

well said T2, and having being there yourself and moved on it makes it 100x more so.

T2: John has no idea how frustrated I am...I haven't told him anything in the way of an ultimatum---it's just my personal feelings. I certainly don't want him to think that he has to lose the weight or he's going to lose me. I've talked to him before about certain things lacking in our marriage and it didn't have any effect what-so-ever...you'd think it would but it didn't. That was 4 years ago. New topic: John didn't tell his doctor about those things on his legs (they're freakin' gross) I hope they go away soon. The trainer has John on a 30-40 minute weight lifting regimen and a 30 minute cardio workout 3 times a week and the other 3 days we work out he just does 25 minutes of cardio. He won't weigh himself again until Saturday the 2nd of September--hopefully he'll have dropped a bunch more weight.

I'm just impatient.

I was baby-sitting all day so I missed my workout today, I'll do it tomorrow. I'm hoping with this day off that my muscles will have rested and I'll see a big jump on the scale on Monday--unfortunately I ate about 1700 calories today. Not terrible, definately below 2000 but 600 over what I have been aiming this week. It was a turkey sandwich---I ate a 8 inch sub from Quiznos. It was yummy.

I'm watching Annie with my neice. We watch Annie every time she comes over. I created a monster!

Thanks for listening everyone!

Thank you for not hitting me with the boppy stick