I've decided to start a diary of my progress. I'm quite encouraged, and think this will actually help me a lot. I tend to put these things off for months on end, and when I finally get on the train... I seem to fall straight off again Hopefully writing (ok, typing) it out will help me to stick to it, and finally get me to where I want to be.

I'm going to use the questions in the sticky thread... and some of my own that I've added. Just so I can really see my motivation and where I need to go.

Starting Weight: 119lbs
Height: 5'2''


How much weight do you want to lose? 7lbs (to begin with anyway). I know that it's not a huge amount, and might sound pathetic to a lot of people on here. But it's extra weight I have been carrying for a long time, weight that racks my confidence and physical ability - weight that I finally want to shift.

What is your motivation for losing the weight? Firstly, my confidence. Despite having issues with both my weight and acne, I am a happy and bubbly person. But recently this has started to change. I spend hours getting ready to go anywhere, so I can hide my belly bulge. I can't wear tight clothes, and I feel embarrased shopping with my friends. I want this to change.

Secondly, in the summer I am going on an expedition to Zambia. It was a tough selection, and we have been told we need to be in good physical shape. Hah. I've stupidly been putting it off, and truly am getting desperate. It is not just about how I look, but having the fitness and stamina required to give my all to the Zambian community projects, so I can help to the best of my ability.

What is the timeframe for reaching your (first) target weight? February. Prefering the start of the month, but I'm not sure if that is realistic - I have a feeling the weight won't be too happy about leaving. I can be flexible as long as my fitness is not suffering.

How do you want to accomplish your goal (what methods do you want to use)? Exercise and moderate eating. I'm quite a lazy person, and horse-riding is the only real exercise I do... that must change. I'll just tell myself over and over that it releases happy endorphines As for "Dieting" it just doesn't work for me. I have tried many times, but my love affair with peanut butter is too passionate. And if I deny myself chocolate, I only crave it more. So I plan to have small treats, and eat sensibly.

Who or what can support you in reaching your goal? My friends don't seem to understand (all of them being annoyingly slim), but my family are wonderful. They have always encouraged me, and I know I have their full support.

How realistic is your goal? Hopefully realistic... or I honestly wouldn't be trying. I think - No, I will do it!

When will you start? Right now!!... actually, I might have one last indulge... we're having pizza for tea

What do you ultimately want to achieve? A slightly slimmer, fitter, healthier, happy me

Good luck! I know you'll loose those 7 pounds in no time.

Thank you - I think I might need it!

And I'm not so sure about "no time"... at least when you work hard to lose a lot of weight, you have the satisfaction of seeing the pounds drop off! It seems the less you have to lose, the more it clings to you
But hopefully it will work out... I just need to know I'm going in the right direction - down!

Hmm... didn't do so great today. My nan and granddad have come up to stay, so my mum decided to make mince pies. The smell of freshly baking mince pies - torture! Somehow I managed to avoid them, but the rest of my eating fell apart a bit.

Breakfast: A bowl of bran flakes and milk. This was ok - so far so good.

Lunch: Ah. All went a bit rubbish here. Fresh baguettes. So before I know it I've wolfed a massive chunk of baguette with a load of egg mayonaisse The maddening thing is, I could easily have cut it in half or had a lower fat filling - I just didn't. Darn it.

Dinner: Darn, darn, darn. Having said "no thank you" to mince pies and chocolate biscuits, I completely indulged with a baked potato. Ok, a small potato with no butter might not sound that bad - until I smothered it in baked beans and cheese When I could have eaten half a potato and salad... or at the very least left off the cheese. I just don't know why I do these things... I sure as hell regret it afterwards, but I'm just weak and give in. You'd think after so many years as a vegetarian I'd have learnt some self-control, or at least started eating vegetables. This is the first time I've actually admitted to being a veggie who doesn't eat vegetables... I'm horribly unhealthy, and I know eating the greens would make such a difference to all parts of my life. It's just a reminder of how much motivation I lack, and I feel awful.

What makes it worse is that I'll give myself this big "eat greens instead" talk. Then tomorrow I'll see the cabbage, turn up my nose and go straight back to the peanut butter sandwiches.

Plus (continued rant here), in my room I currently have:
●3 Selection boxes (1 Kinder, 1 Galaxy, 1 Nestle)
●2 boxes of Maltesers
●1 box of Celebrations
●1 box of tablet
●A giant chocolate santa
●A selection of thorntons chocolate reindeer
Why must people insist on giving me delicious treats for Christmas???

Oh, and I finally watched Season 2 episode 8 of Green Wing... and Mac is terminally ill (I know this has nothing to do with anything, but I'm in a depressive mood.)

Now, just to try and end of a bit of a positive: I actually did some exercise today! Ok, just a 30 min jog, but an improvement nonetheless

Wow, I actually feel a bit better after writing all that down.