HAHAHAH!!!! I'm glad I'm not the only one who does that. Unfortunately, it doesnt' really deter me...I think "well I'm already gross..what's one more piece of chocolate."
I think I have issues

Krystal, We can go together. I'm at 275 and I am going to 190. We can be buddies!!!

Only if we can high-5 a lot

ohh ok..i'm at 224 and want to lose about 75...... well good luck to u and congrats on the 5lbs lost!

Krystal,
You're not totally messed up, you're on the right track now.

Congratulations on your success! I am so happy for you!

Morning Krys!!

I'm gonna call you later when we are on our way to Ohio. You can't expect me to converse with Sean for 13 straight hours, can you? Whatcha gonna do this weekend? Walk on the treadmill?

Thanks I appreciate the encouragement.

Today I had some bran flakes and milk for breakfast, and I'm eating some oysters for lunch. Ucky. What I really want is a giant fruit basket to magically be delivered to my doorstep. I would snarf that fucker down faster than the delivery guy could get out of the driveway.
My mother got into town today. She and I have a very tumultuous relationship. It's been up and down my whole life. I think we've finally figured out a way to tolerate each other, so it's not wholly horrifying when she arrives anymore, but it still stresses me out. She does NOT take care of herself. She doesn't exercise. She eats nothing but chocolate and processed crap. She doesn't eat ANYTHING healthy. I've tried telling her so many times that eating healthy will change so many things in her life...her health, the way she feels, her weight, her skin, her bowels, and even her attitude...
But who am I to harp about it? The "fat" girl can't give healthy eating tips and expect to be taken seriously.
All I know is that when I eat healthy food, my entire life transforms. My skin clears up. My weight goes down. My energy goes up. I sleep wonderfully. My fibromyalgia seems to disappear. I'm in a better mood...everything just improves. Lately with all the 'crap' food we've eaten, ALL of that has gone drastically downhill. So I know that the improvement of our diet is the very best thing for us. I just wish I could get her to see that.
And I wish I could get my fat ass to stick to that thinking as well

Eff you Amy!!! LOL
My mom is here. That's exercise enough.

You are so right, eating reight just changes everything! YOU'D THINK THAT WOULD MAKE ME WANT TO DO IT MORE OFTEN!

We're having to pinch every single penny lately, so of course that means cheap food...which means CRAP food. I feel pretty gross lately because of it. I'm SO ready for tax returns!
So I guess the diet is kind of on the back burner lately, which sucks ass.
Oh well...it will be a fresh start when we finally have some money!!

Well, maybe when you're on a budget you'll eat less...wishful thinking isnt it?

Well good luck. You can still keep up the exercise and at least watch the portions.

Fresh mushrooms, mixed berries, and water for breakfast. Man I will feel SO much better about everything when the weather warms up, and Scott and I can go walk every night again.

Mushrooms and berries? Ahhh, fungi and fruit, the breakfast of champions!!

So whatcha doing today Biatch? Besides fantasizing about me nekkid?

This morning (after multiple hours of picturing Amy naked) I ate some raspberries and blueberries for breakfast. Then I had a spring mix salad, with cauliflower, broccoli, mushrooms, and 15 calories worth of that salad spritzer dressing. I also ate like 4 or 5 of those stupid mini-reeces peanut butter cups while I was on the phone with my mother...force of habit. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
I'm currently enjoying my lunch time can of tuna and olive oil, without salt...yay me!

Berry filled crepes this morning for breakfast. I got the recipe from the Biggest Loser website. It wasn't too bad...I think I'll have to experiment with the kinds of berries I put in, because it was a little bit tart for me so early in the morning. Lunch is some tuna and avocado, possibly followed by some nanners or mushrooms if I'm still feeling munchy.
Scott and I are going to join the YMCA this year, so that no matter what the weather, we have a place to work out, or swim, and we won't have "it's cold" as an excuse not to do it. We are both the worst enablers for each other...I'm not sure what to do about that yet. I'm hoping that forking over the $70 a month for the YMCA will be a big motivator for both of us to get our asses in there to work out.
I really don't want to go thru another year being fat. Not just for vanity's sake, but because it's really starting to take it's toll on me. When I'm on the phone, I can't converse and mill around the house doing things like I used to, because I get short of breath. It's embarrassing. Getting dressed is a battle because everything clings, rides up, squeezes, pinches...you name it. And let me tell you that when you're a fat girl anyway, and PMS pays it's monthly bloating visit...it's not pretty.
I literally feel as if I'm in someone else's skin. This body is like a big overstuffed coat that belongs to someone else. I'm so ready to get out of it. I feel like the true me is hidden underneath all these layers.
I have to stop making excuses. Unless I get off of my fat ass and MOVE, the weight isn't going to come off. I can't expect the food to do the work for me. I can't expect that eating veggies and fruit and fish is going to change everything all at once. I do feel MUCH better because of the change in diet, but I'm not going to lose weight if I don't get my ass up out of my chair and DO something.
I hope joining the YMCA is the motivation I need.

I think it might be time to revisit my old councilor. I have known for a long time that food is more than just food for me. It's a comfort. It's something that I literally obsess over sometimes. At breakfast I'm thinking about lunch. At lunch I'm thinking about dinner...you get the picture. It's one thing for which I honestly can't pinpoint the "why." I'm humiliated by it, because I know it must seem like the most disgusting, pathetic thing to an outsider. "Just stop eating, fatass..."
What if an alcoholic had to have three drinks a day for the rest of his life? What if a coke addict had to snort at least three lines every day? But not OVERdo it...
Meh...I need a therapist who is a personal trainer. Someone who can ask me how I feel about that while they're spanking my ass on the stair-master.