I have so much to say about this topic but I should really be in bed, so I will just comment on one quote that I really feel like I have to...trust me if I had time, and if I felt comfortable posting mile-long "essays" on here about this kind of thing, I'd have done it in a second...

So anyway, what I wanted to say is this: I have to put it out there that I think you've got it a little confused...please realise that what you said is NOT true; I've been there. You really don't get the guy and the peers and the popularity and all else you mentioned - maybe you do, in the beginning. But then things get nasty: people worry and tell you to stop and when you feel bad but you can't stop that worry turns to anger and they get mad at you; then when you really start feeling hurt that they don't understand but are yelling at you and you feel terrible that you are hurting THEM, and you are thus further driven into you're own trap, they see that you're still losing weight and they get scared; and this is when they start inching away...avoiding you. Or maybe it's because you are avoiding them, because you are scared out of your mind that you might eat something around them or that they will ask questions or because you feel sick or weak from not eating - or because you are bloated from a binge or just feel "too fat." And then the fear turns to disgust if you manage to bring yourself so low as to look like death walking around...or lying in a hospital bed being tube-fed. And then they get sad again. And the whole time you are so much more sad, and cut off from the world whether intentional or not and whether you realize it or not, because your whole view of the world is upside down and inside out from theirs. So no -- you do not get the guy and the peers and all that jazz. You lose them.

Yeah, you get attention...but once you start getting it you won't want it, believe me.

I just thought I could clarify that, and maybe stop someone from going down that road. It's not worth it.

you go sister! lol!

we shorties sure carry our weight differently. I am aiming for 54 kilos which is perfectly normal for a 1.56 size, of course I just want to be healthier and drop a couple of jean sizes to actually find a cute pair that fits! :P damn it is hard to find a size 11 around here! they should get the hint that we latinas have hips, butts and legs!

I think you made a very important point: we all succumb a bit to peer pressure from time to time, the fat jokes, the mean people.. even our parents. and we feel the pressure to be thiner all around us. but what many people don't get is that it is a disease and a harsh one- it affects your state of mind, social relations, everything. Many of these girls don't want to live that kind of life but they are trapped in it. they know it isn't healthy but our mind is more powerful, boy do I know that. I had dysmporphia and it doesn't completely go away, I still struggle to say nice things to myself in the mirror and not obsess over my big thighs and hips.
I just wish there'd be more information about it and people would be more careful- naming everything wrong with it won't help these girls. blaming them, being mad at them, forcing them to eat- none. the right path is that of self esteem, acceptance and love and it is a long, painful road.

I think it's really sad that the girls are pro ana/mia/ed. I've come across several xanga group sites all promoting the eating disorders and I was just shocked. I just don't get it.

well this might be some controversy...

But.. I think its bad..definately.
but in the same respect, there is BBW (big beautiful women) which isnt healthy either.

Its just sad that with the thinspiration its pretty much all young girls..and yeah..starving themselves. its horrible and there's a lot of horrible things out there..like

the suicide forum thing that people encourage other people to do that..

sick sad world.

I know you know this already, but your goals are very healthy. Some taller people don't understand that it's OK for shorties to weigh less.

thanks hun!
I am glad you came here, we are the same height so it is indeed perfectly normal to weight less- we don't carry weight the same way tall people do. if I were taller I'd look so much better! many tall people don't get it indeed.
xoxo

i think also that race perhaps needs to be brought up here also.
I had co-workers who were not only short, but extremely fine boned. and if they had the 'correct' BMI they would be overweight because they were indian or of asian decent.
However in contrast, i would expect somebody with say an Island or African American heritage to be much more on the heavy side, even if they were the same height.

I know for a fact that i tend to be on the heavy side, this is not a cop out or excuse. im just more muscular than the average person, and it runs in the family (both mums and dads). I often have friends guess my weight as lighter than them when im 10kg (20lb) heavier

Hey..Id take being guessed as 20 lb lighter! haha

I have always been the same way! (I don't know about now, but in high school, I definitely was).

I have a "large frame"- whatever the hell that means.

you sure as hell don't look like you have a large frame!!
i'm supposedly a small frame...then why can't i just get small and stay small foreverrrrrr!!

I agree with you there!!

But when I do the "elbow breadth" and wrist circumference test, they both come up in the "large" category based on my bone size.

Unless I'm doing it wrong or possibly have a faulty measuring tape. I don't really trust it because according to those calculations I am 7 pounds underweight.....

Yeah freakin' right!

I used to have anorexia and never went to those websites, I did not WANT to have it. Those girls who do, they are just..terrible. They don't understand that it doesn't make you pretty, it makes you disgusting.

I used to have Anorexia Nervosa up until about 4 years ago (I went through several years of treatment centers). I never went to those sites, but now I find myself perusing them once in a very great while. I don't post anything on them because my philosphy has always been that "I am not pro-anorexia in anyone other than myself", meaning that I wouldn't wish it upon anyone in the world.
I have a question though! I have a very young niece (almost 4 years old), who is very smart! She copies me a lot. Lately, I have heard her say things like "I'm not pretty", or when I say she's smart, she'll say "no!". The other day, when she got her hair cut, she was playing and then all of the sudden she ran, yelling "Everyone's looking at me!" and then hid behind her sister's stroller. She has, in the past, copied my eating "Auntie's not finishing..."

So my question is, how do I get my niece to not go down the road I went down (with Anorexia Nervosa and whatnot)?

WillLose

I totally agree with you on this.. it is very disturbing to see young girls -- or even older women -- supporting each other through encouraging this sort of behavior. It is very dangerous, and it can cause significant health problems.

I think one of the most troubling stories I read on it was that of a promising danger who was anorexic. It cost her that dancing career, as she shattered her knee in a jump because her bone structure had started to decay thanks to her starving herself.

It really makes me sad thinking of how these girls (and boys too) are on a quick track to ruining their lives.